Friday, December 12, 2008

内心的呼喊

Indeed , my heart is crying out loud.. Crying in Pain..
I'm feeling as if my heart is ripping apart..
My eyes are teary.. my nose is blocking..
It's like a part of me is dying..
I'm losing strength..
People are selfish.. but .. how..
how can they be so incredibly selfish..
Don't they care.. care about how others feel..
I'm so tired of it..
God.. Please lord.. Please.. Save me..
the ones who have been mocked , that have been hurt by other because of you shall be proud of themselves..
but lord.. it's a painful and slow sluggish time..
When I'm talking no one hears.. no one give their best..
God.. You can see..
may you open their eyes as well..
when their practicing.. there are only complains complains n more complains..
why couldn't they just stop and listen ..
Time is short.. we're racing against it..
but they seem to not know..
they just do whatever they want hear if they're feeling good today..
n now.. their telling me.. they know their not good enough and they think theres not enough practice.. they're not good enough and as if I'm just a tool they'll find in use when they need it..
I HAD ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENCE..
I gave all I could.. Time Brain power strength voice prayers..
everything..
but what have they did..
LORD..
I really don't know lord.. I don't know how to move on..
There is a heart breaking thought of letting it go..
but when I think of what god gave me..
all the precious blessings..
I wish to go on.. I want to walk on..
I've poured out my love for them.. but they have not noticed..
lord .. I'm drying out of love..
lord today.. fill me with your love once again..
Give me strength ..
guide me lead me..
lord..
You have led me so far..
Don't give up on me..
Don't turn away from me..
Lord I pray that we can give our best to you..
And lord please forgive them..
they don't know what they're doing to me..
although I feel heart broken and I believe lord you know how it feels..
but lord.. today .. I pray for mercy ..
God forgive them forgive me..
Cover us with your precious blood..
I feel so tired.. no one.. NO ONE can understand..
I guess they will never know ..
But..
I still want to give thanks although I feel so tired..
so sad.. I cried out so hard..
lord.. you are still with me..
and I believe you will not leave me..
Not now.. n Not ever..
Never..
lord today.. I've said it out..
for years I kept it to myself n between us..
我内心的呼喊..
in Jesus name I pray Amen.

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